i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Randomize