Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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