one two three fourrrrnication!
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I love you.
Bad choice
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
