I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
He felt like a one man threesome
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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