Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
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