Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
