stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
