U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
