Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
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