i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
