Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
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