What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
