i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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