I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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