I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
