SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
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