If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
just tell him i said nine months
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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