Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize