I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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