remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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