he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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