Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
