U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize