with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize