We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Randomize
