is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Randomize
