I'm going to jail i love you
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
