I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
