Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize