this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Randomize