Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
