your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize