I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
