Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
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