So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
