He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Please, let me fuck your mom
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
i dont even know how to be here
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize
