Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
