this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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