whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
