So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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