i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Randomize
