So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Randomize
