Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
i think im in europe. pls send help
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
