Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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