I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
