so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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