I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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