Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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