We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
