that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
