I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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